 Sequel to "cult" (geez that term is s***) TV movie of some repute - bet you didn't know THAT!!!! Replacing Karen Black (when is someone gonna put Burnt Offerings on VHS - while you're at it DESTROY all copies of goddamned Airport 75...) with Lysette Anthony is a double-edged dilemma; Anthony is soooooo good lookin' she detracts from the fillum itself. The only reason most "informed" viewers will be drawn to this is the Zuni Fetish Doll and/or Dan "Dark Shadows" Curtis' (surprisingly) large "cult" following. Trio of tales - Lysette (looking as if groomed by Hillary Clinton) is "eaten" (ooooo!) by Pokemon-sized rats while ripping-off grave; Lysette is strangled by obnoxious youth clad in mask seemingly rejected by Don Post & Lysette suffers Multiple Stab Wounds then grows a set of fangs & forgets to brush her hair. Sharing the same problem as most horror dreck - dumb endings - Trilogy still offers mucho funs***. I must make mention of the person who essays the role of Lysette's illicit luvver in first tale - this individual seems to be a bona-fide alien lifeform that has engorged itself with the primary characteristics of three distinct persons; Benny Hill (God amongst men), Roger Moore (best Bond) & John Farnham (mediocre M.o.R. crooner) - quite "uncanny". Now, about that musical duo Daphne & Celeste. Did you see the "School's Out" promo? Why do people insist on covers of zis Alice Cooper throwaway? Does it "speak" to that "rebellious spirit" within us all, or, are the royalties more affordable than something by say... ABBA? I have not heard a version (including the original) of this song that doesn't make me cringe during the "no more pencils, no more books..." aaaarrrrggghhhh!!! Even German metal band Gravedigger couldn't save it. My suggestion - get someone with a voice like a flu-ravaged shark to sing the f*****; perhaps Dark Funeral or Mortician. Let's face it, this song is U.G.L.Y. - oooooo "STICK YOU"!! You may read another review, submit your own, or return home. |
