 Okay. Disclaimer: this is not actually a bad movie review. In fact it is the review of a really really good movie...one of my personal favorites.It technically qualifies as a "Bad" movie,I suppose,in that it was low-budget even by mid-Eighties standards.(Actually It's real claim to Badness was that it actually starred Adrian Pasdar in the lead role.One word: BLECH.)But EVERYBODY else in this movie just kicked ass.(well,okay,not Tim Thomerson.Sheesh.)Lance Henrikson.Bill Paxton.Jeanette Goldstein.Jenny Wright.We literally have half the cast of "Aliens" standing here in a grungy,NON-sexy,yeah-I-drink-blood-whatcha-gonna-do-about-it vampire movie.(The Aliens bit is no coincidence: Director Katheryn Bigelow was married to James Cameron (Aliens) at the time and all of the above,with the exception of Miss Wright,were close friends of the then-couple.)Okay,enough trivia: THE MOVIE:Uber-Hick Caleb(Pasdar) tries to pick up foxy little number Mae (Wright) and ends up regretting it for the rest of the film after she turns him into one of the un-dead.In the process of watching Caleb whine,we are introduced to Jesse(Henrikson),Diamondback(Goldstein)and Severen(Paxton),three tough,unrepentant predators out for fun and mayhem on the highway(I deliberately left out Homer,since he annoys me deeply.).Once all the players are in place,the film really takes off,With some absolutely classic nightstalker action coming from this bunch of ruffians.(THOSE WHO STILL THINK LOUIS WAS JUST MISUNDERSTOOD AND LESTAT WAS ACTUALLY A METAPHOR FOR CHRIST:Come on.Anne Rice is SO early Nineties.Take off the velvet pants and come get dirty with the rest of us.)Something to think about: not one time in this movie is the word "vampire" ever mentioned;you will not see one single fang.Yet this remains one of the best vampire movies ever made,one of the few that actually helped define the genre without falling victim to it.OH,and by the way,I must say that I stand corrected;my good friend Lon very rightly pointed out to me that Al Pacino and Johnny Depp DID actually star in a movie together-Donnie Brasco. DUH. I just thought that I'd go ahead and own up to that now,since one of the requirements of punditry is to be able to admit that you're just as dumb as everyone else.(Well,okay,not actually a requirement,but it does make you heaps more fun at parties.)Anyway,go rent Near Dark.Rent it twice.Hell,buy a copy.(Yes,this coming from me,arguably the cheapest guy on this site.)Trust Me. About the author: The author still lives in Florida,and is beginning to suspect that those ominously vague pharmecutical ads must be hiding something really sinister... You may read another review, submit your own, or return home. |
